Hey everybody,

This is my second pixel I post on Pixeljoint and I need some critism of you hero's:)

Anyway, here it is:

 

It's not done yet:)

 

Cheers,

.Vinno

Hi,

I'ts a great start, good job.

Here's a list of points i believe will help improve your work:

The walls are bare, very bare. I would suggest adding windows, doors, brick to spice it up.

Your light source is in an AMAZING position. You need to play off of it. It is behind your left buildings, so their front's must be darker. A shadow should be cast from the back left building, across the entire frame, nearly to the right side of the bottom of the river. The buildings on the right should be MUCH brighter, even off color, because they're being hit with direct sunlight. Your bridge should cast a shadow in the corner where it will stick out from the shadow cast off the buildings. the windows on the buildings on the left should not have a shine on them, as there's no sun reflecting off of them. (they can have a little because its a bright day, but no 'direct sunlight' reflection.

Your sidewalk needs to be broken up into pieces, either in tiles, or into slates.

I would suggest adding foliage in the foreground to balance out the background. Preferably in the gaps between buildings, in the front on the right, and in small gardens in front of buildings (which are a little bare)

Another good thing about your light source is that it allows you to show volume on your clouds really nicely. You can make the edge near the sun REALLY bright, and then cut it off with darker values, reason being that near the edge of the cloud its thin, the further you go into the cloud, it gets thicker. The thicker the cloud the less sun that gets through. as for your other cloud, you can do it very similarly, the only difference is don't us AS much contrast. Meaning, you don't want it to look like the sun is behind THAT cloud, but it is behind the clouds. In addition you can add some highlights to the front of the cloud as well.

I think I hit most of the major points of you're piece. if you need clarification of anything, or just want our opinion on any edit you make. Post it and we'll go from there.

PS: here's a reference for the clouds: http://case-connect.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/sun_in_white_cloud-784254.jpg

EDIT: Dpixel beat me to the punch!

Edited by StepDragon - 07 June 2010 at 1:24pm

don't be shy

MORE CONTRAST!!!!!

especially with the clouds.
the windows are still a little too light IMO.
and you definately need some more detailing on the walls...

I like what you did with the sidewalk, but it seems a little too perfect, too flat, too 'drawn'...

i'm not a fan of dithering, i would suggest holding off on the dithering on the buildings at least until you have details such as bricks or the like.

same thing goes for the sun, sun rays are NOT rough. (ignore film grain)... i think some additional colors may... "MAY" need to be added for a smooth sun rays.

another note about the sun, the rays don't just exist, look at the reference, the rays exist only where the clouds cover them... if the sun is out in the sky, you're not going to see any rays.

i also just noticed a problem with your perspective... is this supposed to be a 1, 2 or 3 perspective piece, because right now you have 3 vanishing points, and they're all lined up on the horizon...

one in the center, and one off the page to ether side.... I would highly suggest making this either a one point or two point perspective. (preferabbly 2)

in which case (assuming you went with the point in the middle, and on the left) the roof of the first building on the right, would be slanting upwards instead of down (as you go from left to right) pointing (left) at the same point that the buildings on the left are...


i'll post an edit soon if i can, to show you the perspective issue.

Cheers!

ok the link, and image things aren't working, ive tried like 10 edits, so here's the link to the image:


OK, here's an edit for you, i had to make it really wide to show where the vanishing points were. the blue lines are the third points lines, and the black lines are the second points.

i replaced the blue lines with black ones, and used a brighter version of your colors to point out the areas which would now be pert of the buildings.

Hope this helps!

Edited by StepDragon - 17 June 2010 at 12:07pm

accidentally double posted, and i don't know how to delete this, so just ignore this post please!

Edited by StepDragon - 11 June 2010 at 11:47am

I love the shading on the clouds, but I think you should get rid of the sun's rays and making the shading on the house's side straighter.  Or, did you mean for the wall to be curvy?

Great update, looking good.

Here's a few things, your sun is still not (hitting) your clouds. i think a sharp bright outline on parts of the cloud will help that.

you still don't have enough contrast IMO. its hard to see where the sun is, and isn't. along the same lines as that, it dosen't look like the sun is showing, its too gloomy, brighten it up.

the shadow on the left, starting at the house, has an odd angle... it should be slightly NW-SE, not NE-SW...(compass)

anyways here's an edit for you to help show what i'm talking about... i added a bright border on the clouds, added a little more saturation to the sun. incriesed the contrast by brightening the buildings in direct sunlight, and drew some lines on it to help illustrate where the shadow would go. (even though its a little messy)