Walter Sobchak Quotes

This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass!

Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski
You know, Dude, I myself dabbled in pacifism once. Not in 'Nam of course.

Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski (1998)
Look, without a hostage, there is no ransom. That's what ransom is. Those are the fucking rules!

Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski (1998)
Walter Sobchak: Those rich fucks! This whole fucking thing... I did not watch my buddies die face down in the muck so that this fucking strumpet...

The Dude: I don't see any connection to Vietnam, Walter.

Walter Sobchak: Well, there isn't a literal connection, Dude.

The Dude: Walter, face it, there isn't any connection.

Jeffrey 'The Dude' Lebowski/Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski (1998)
The Dude: What's in the fuckin' carrier?

Walter Sobchak: Huh? Oh, that's Cynthia's dog. I think it's a Pomeranian. I can't leave him home alone or he eats the furniture. I'm watching him while Cynthia and Marty Ackerman are in Hawaii.

The Dude: You brought the fuckin' Pomeranian bowling?

Walter Sobchak: What do you mean brought it bowling, Dude? I didn't rent it shoes. I'm not buying it a fucking beer. He's not taking your fucking turn, Dude.

The Dude: Man, if my fuckin' ex-wife asked me to take care of her fuckin' dog while she and her boyfriend went to Honolulu I'd tell her to go fuck herself.

Walter Sobchak/Jeffrey 'The Dude' Lebowski, The Big Lebowski (1998)
Jesus Quintana: You ready to be fucked man? I see you rolled your way into the semis. Dios mio, man. Liam and me, we're gonna fuck you up.

The Dude: Yeah, well, that's just, like, your opinion, man.

Jesus Quintana: Let me tell you something, bandejo. You pull any of your crazy shit with us, you flash a piece out on the lanes, I'll take it away from you, stick it up your ass and pull the fucking trigger 'til it goes "click".

The Dude: Jesus.

Jesus Quintana: You said it man. Nobody fucks with the Jesus.

Walter Sobchak: Eight year-olds, Dude.

Jeffrey 'The Dude' Lebowski/Jesus Quintana/Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski (1998)
The Dude: Fuckin' Quintana... that creep can roll, man.

Walter Sobchak: Yeah, but he's a pervert, Dude.

The Dude: Yeah.

Walter Sobchak: No, he's a sex offender. With a record. He served 6 months in Chino for exposing himself to an eight year old.

The Dude: Oh.

Walter Sobchak: When he moved to Hollywood he had to go door to door to tell everyone he was a pederast.

Donny: What's a... pederast, Walter?

Walter Sobchak: Shut the fuck up, Donny.

Walter Sobchak/Jeffrey 'The Dude' Lebowski/Donny, The Big Lebowski (1998)
The Dude: Will you come off it, Walter? You're not even fucking Jewish, man.

Walter Sobchak: What the fuck are you talkin' about?

The Dude: Man, you're fucking Polish Catholic...

Walter Sobchak: What the fuck are you talking about? I converted when I married Cynthia! Come on, Dude!

The Dude: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah...

Walter Sobchak: And you know this!

The Dude: Yeah, and five fucking years ago you were divorced.

Walter Sobchak: So what are you saying? When you get divorced you turn in your library card? You get a new license? You stop being Jewish?

The Dude: It's all a part of your sick Cynthia thing, man. Taking care of her fucking dog. Going to her fucking synagogue. You're living in the fucking past.

Walter Sobchak: Three thousand years of beautiful tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax...
[Shouting] You're goddamn right I'm living in the fucking past!

Jeffrey 'The Dude' Lebowski/Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski (1998)
Walter Sobchak: OVER THE LINE!

Smokey: Huh?

Walter Sobchak: I'm sorry, Smokey. You were over the line that's a foul.

Smokey: Bullshit. Mark it 8, Dude.

Walter Sobchak: Uh, excuse me. Mark it zero. Next frame.

Smokey: Bullshit, Walter. Mark it 8, Dude.

Walter Sobchak: Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules.

Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski (1998)
Walter Sobchak: The man in the black pajamas, Dude. Worthy fuckin' adversary.

Donny: Who's in pajamas Walter?

Walter Sobchak: Shut the fuck up, Donny.

Walter Sobchak/Donny, The Big Lebowski (1998)
The Dude: It's like what Lenin said... you look for the person who will benefit, and, uh, uh...

Donny: I am the walrus.

The Dude: You know what I'm trying to say...

Walter Sobchak: That fucking bitch...

Donny: I am the walrus.

Walter Sobchak: shut the fuck up, Donny! V.I. Lenin. Vladimir Illanich Uleninov!

Jeffrey 'The Dude' Lebowski/Walter Sobchak/Donny, The Big Lebowski (1998)

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