Hi :D

First of all, you should link to your image using the [I][/I] tags. That way it'll show up directly in the forum without anyone having to click a link, AND everyone will be able to click-zoom it.

As for the art itself, it's a bit early to tell, but on the castle I'd advise you to focus on really nailing that cylindrical shape before you start texturing, or at least keep the shape firmly in mind while you texture. What I usually do is paint in very rough blobs of darker/lighter shades to indicate the rough 3D shape of the object, then texture on top of that, using it as a guideline for where the texture should be darker or lighter. I know you've only done a bit so far, but it seems like it's in danger of looking very, very flat.

As for the texture itself, it looks like you've got a lot of random, noisy pixels in there. Even if you're going for a kind of rough look I'd clean it up a little, or at least use less contrasting colors so it doesn't look so sandpaper-y.

You mentioned your palette. I agree that you should gawth it up a bit. Try moving towards blues/purples in shadow. That'll help give it a nice moody feel. You can also go straight black to match the background in deep shadow, but do so sparingly or nothing will be readable.

Anyway, keep it up! You're off to a good start.

I'm just some guy on the internet and all of my advice can be ignored safely.

Except for putting your image in [I]<url here>[/I] tags. Don't ignore that. You'll be a million times more likely (at a very conservative estimate) to get replies and helpful critique.

ahhh, I'm such a douchebag. I meant [img][/img] tags. That'll teach me to post early in the morning. Oh well, you figured it out, despite my epic fail.

Edited by Hatch - 23 June 2009 at 6:47am

Sorry for the double post, but i made an update!

Edited by ShoySlayer - 24 June 2009 at 1:58am

Do you mind explaining?

Edited by ShoySlayer - 24 June 2009 at 3:36am

oh, that. you can see i DID impove some of the thing he said.

The Perspective is Platformer-like,it's lopsided for making a "dark" atmoshpere and "dark" feeling. and what's hue shifting?

ohhhh, okay then, as long it doesn't pass the special 3 color limit.although i'll stay with the old desigh.

The weird castle thing i made was just a example,
I was using more than one object to show you the difference
between the hue shifted colors and the old colors.

kay

i give crits so they can improve, this applies to technique and attitude as they both relate to how good one's art can be. this is off-topic, only post if you have something constructive to say about the WIP

@shoyslayer: only bump your topic with updates on the art, not one-word responses


Edited by ThereIsNoCure - 24 June 2009 at 4:25pm

"it's lopsided for making a "dark" atmoshpere and "dark" feeling."

I think its actually having the opposite effect and making it look un-serious and cartoonish. 

Your shading needs work. Th lighter pixels are evenly distributed along most of the left side, with just a small column of darkness on the right. This makes it feel like it has a flat face on the left that's receiving most of the light.

Your shape is basically a cylinder. If you Google "cylinder" (or possibly "cylindrical tower"), you'll find all kinds of examples of how these look in real life. They generally have a column of brightness on the spot that's facing a light source, and it gradually gets darker as the cylinder curves away. How wide this column of brightness is depends on the material and the intensity of the light source: shiny metal focuses light into an extremely narrow column, whereas something like your tower will diffuse the light and spread it more evenly.

As an exercise, I'd suggest removing all of your bricks and dither and just trying to make a smooth cylindrical shape, preferably while staring at photos of real cylindrical objects.

And another thing. Dither. A) it should be one of the last things you do, and B) when your colors are so high-contrast, it's going to look gritty even if you do a cleaner, more patterned dither. I'd lose the dither altogether until you get the shading right, and then CONSIDER adding it back in. And if you decide to, do it sparingly. A little goes a long way on a piece this small, and you've got it pretty much everywhere right now.

Good luck, and don't get discouraged even if people seem harsh. Remember that they wouldn't even be bothering posting if they didn't think your piece had potential.

That has a much better sense of volume. Good work.

I'd make the bricks smaller at the bottom than at the top, the same way the tower as a whole is. Right now you've got the bricks going down at an angle to match the left side, but because of the building's tapered shape, it sort of makes them look like they're spiraling around it, if that makes sense. Same goes for your shading, I'd say: taper it, rather than matching the angle of the left side.

I'd probably lower the brightness of your brightest color a couple notches, and maybe dither it just a tad to blend with the next darkest shade (if you're really certain you can't add another color).

Maybe desaturate all your colors a good bit? It'll make it feel more run-down and grim.

Sure.



I know it's really crummy. I had to slap it together in a couple minutes, so sorry.

Anyway, from left to right: how your grid of bricks is aligned, how the grid should be aligned, how your shading is aligned, how your shading should be aligned. They should taper down to match the width of the building rather than just lining up to match the angle of the left side. As you can see, it sort of looks like they're curving or spiraling around the building in the latter case.

If this still isn't clear, let me know and I'll try to explain better (and I'll find time to make a better example pic)

Your shading, dithering, and sense of volume are all VASTLY better. Great job!

That said, I think you may have misunderstood what my crummy example pic was saying. Firstly, I wasn't suggesting that your grid of bricks should be all arrow-straight lines, I was saying they should get slimmer at the bottom to match the overall shape of the tower rather than all be parallel to the left edge. Ditto for your shading. I think the rough, irregular grid before really helped the mood. My bad for making such a lousy example. I promise I'll make it up to you by doing a better one later. Watch this space.

Edited by Hatch - 28 June 2009 at 7:50pm

it's because my upload site, Spam the web, closed it's image uploading. here's the latest edition: