WIP (Work In Progress)
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fawful
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Quote fawful Replybullet Topic: Improvement needed.
    Posted: 14 October 2008 at 8:40am
Basicly i want some C+C on this unfinished piece here,just anything you can think of that needs improvements or sugestions of what would good thing to add,personly i think it needs more stuff going on but thats just me.
 
:edit:
 
The piece is now finished,and can be seen here.
 
 


Edited by fawful - 20 October 2008 at 9:33am
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RoboBOT
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Quote RoboBOT Replybullet Posted: 14 October 2008 at 8:49am
This looks pretty cool! I suggest you go through and AA everything, especially, the monorail track (is that what it is?) and the moons. I'd also rethink your color choices for the grass and tree. They seem a bit saturated, especially given the lighting. The blue light from the moon would tint it a bit towards blue, also. I'd also make the lighting on the tree and other foreground objects a bit more dramatic. The light source in your piece is completely behind the tree, so it would be a lot darker on the side we can see.
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hsn2555
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Quote hsn2555 Replybullet Posted: 14 October 2008 at 11:16am
awesome
umm , idk but try adding some far stars ,also some bigger grass ..

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chess
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Quote chess Replybullet Posted: 14 October 2008 at 12:17pm
I agree with hsn2555`s stars. good job

Edited by chess - 14 October 2008 at 12:17pm
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fawful
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Quote fawful Replybullet Posted: 14 October 2008 at 12:52pm
Ok i've done some of the above,added a new building,not sure what bigger grass is but oh well.
 
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Fatalis67
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Quote Fatalis67 Replybullet Posted: 14 October 2008 at 2:39pm
I think he means there should be some blades of grass drawn closer to the front. Rather than some grass in the distance then just green.
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fawful
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Quote fawful Replybullet Posted: 14 October 2008 at 4:07pm
Improved grass,made metal things more shiny,and small tweaks.
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Claes
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Quote Claes Replybullet Posted: 14 October 2008 at 11:22pm
Ow, the old building was alot better then that new metal silo or what it is :/ feels rather out of place, did like it more without anything on the right.

The shading on the tree top feels a bit funny, you might want to look at the shadow it casts and then look at the tree itself again.

The grass colour is alot better then in the very first wip. Think you can really work more on the sky however, right now it feels rather... Stiff? mecanical? a more realistic sky has more natural flow in it, and think that would work alot better as contrast to the very hightech monorail and buildings in the backgrund.

Also, as mentiond before, some stuff needs more AA. like the moons, they feel very much to sharp right now, do not feel disstant as for now.
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skamocore
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Quote skamocore Replybullet Posted: 14 October 2008 at 11:33pm
One big problem is, as Robobot pointed out, that it is very saturated. These don't really seem to be the colours you would see at nighttime. A lot of your colours are at full, or almost full, saturation...

A quick saturation adjustment in photoshop:

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Claes
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Quote Claes Replybullet Posted: 14 October 2008 at 11:56pm
Would like to say, that the light from the moon can be very strong if its full, and thus making stuff quite bright with its full colour (with a slright blueness i guess, with a blue moon).

And with this piece, you got 3! full moons, so the light should be rather strong form that (well, if thats how these moons work, they maynot be be same as our moon)

However, the change Skamocore did does work alot better. Atlest now the sky gives the hole thing a loot stronger "at night" feeling. Otherwise I suport stronger colours that you have.
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fawful
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Quote fawful Replybullet Posted: 15 October 2008 at 5:46am
 
Removed building,changed colours in an attemp to make it look like it's night.
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minipuck
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Quote minipuck Replybullet Posted: 15 October 2008 at 7:17am
everything is more saturated but the red of the guys suit just doesn't look right

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skamocore
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Quote skamocore Replybullet Posted: 15 October 2008 at 7:19am
wow, removing the building really helped this piece a lot :O

The man needs a shadow, and the object next to him needs a longer shadow.
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fawful
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Quote fawful Replybullet Posted: 15 October 2008 at 8:58am

AA'd the moons,added stars(i think they look really nice),changed the suit guy to a shade dark shade of blue,bigger shadows and some small tweaks,Better?
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skamocore
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Quote skamocore Replybullet Posted: 15 October 2008 at 9:51am
I have to disagree, you didn't really remove the jaggies in the moon at all...

I'm by no means an AA expert, but I edited a quarter of your right-most moon. As I said, it's not perfect, but I think you can learn something by having a look at what I've done and comparing it to your own version:



I added one colour, but the rest of the colours I used in my AA were already in your image.

Edited by skamocore - 15 October 2008 at 9:52am
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fawful
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Quote fawful Replybullet Posted: 15 October 2008 at 10:25am
I see what you mean,so ive had another go at aaing the moons


Edited by fawful - 15 October 2008 at 10:26am
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RoboBOT
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Quote RoboBOT Replybullet Posted: 15 October 2008 at 10:23pm
This is looking great!
I agree with skamocore about the shadows. Also, I think the foliage of the tree should be darker (as in extend the dark shade out a bit). The foliage looks pretty thick, so not a lot of light would reach this side of the branches.
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fawful
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Quote fawful Replybullet Posted: 17 October 2008 at 9:30am
Last version,any final nit picks?
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fawful
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Quote fawful Replybullet Posted: 20 October 2008 at 9:37am
Hate to bump this,but just thought i'd let you know its finished.
 
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