Pixel Joint Forum: Computer Moniter

Author

Message

CommanderD97
Midshipman

Joined: 28 April 2009
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 47

Topic: Computer Moniter
Posted: 07 July 2009 at 7:01pm

I don't understand why this didn't get in:

Does it need work?

IP Logged

Artisan
Commander

Joined: 01 February 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 219

Posted: 07 July 2009 at 7:09pm

yes it does.

while it is pixel art it is not of quality.

while it does not need to be amazingly good you need to put in effort to make your work nice.

What can you do?

draw the moniter from a better angle.

why a green screen? put something on the screen?

a better depiction of shapes.

a detailed background or transparancy.

a good use of colour.

some sense of DEPTH

... good luck ;)

I like shiny things, i do indeed.

IP Logged

Hatch
Admiral
Admiral

Joined: 05 August 2015
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1387

Posted: 07 July 2009 at 7:30pm

Think about the shapes and levels of depth your monitor. The way you've shaded it makes it look like it's all on one plane. You seem especially confused about the stand--every stand I've seen is somewhat behind the screen. Also, the screen itself--the green part--looks like it's slightly ABOVE the case because there's a strong highlight where there should be a shadow. think about it--light from the top left, the case is slightly raised from the screen... it'd be casting a shadow onto the screen.

Think about your colors. Straight grays tend to be dull--inject just a little color and your picture will come to life. Also, not every color color has to be nuclear cartoon saturated.

here's a quick edit illustrating these points + some general sprucing up. let me know if any of this is unclear or if you're not sure why I did this or that.

[EDIT] Just read the comments for this piece in the gallery. asukicco's comment was uncalled-for and rude. don't get discouraged

Edited by Hatch - 07 July 2009 at 7:35pm

IP Logged

CommanderD97
Midshipman

Joined: 28 April 2009
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 47

Posted: 08 July 2009 at 8:34am

thanks, but I'm not going for the super realistic look. I just wanted a cartoony monitor.

I'll work on it and post something else in a little while.

IP Logged

Hatch
Admiral
Admiral

Joined: 05 August 2015
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1387

Posted: 08 July 2009 at 9:18am

Making something "cartoony" is a matter of careful exaggeration and de-emphasis of various elements. It's not something that happens by accident or by simply misunderstanding the forms of your subject. The way you've shaded many parts of the monitor makes no sense. It doesn't mean you're a bad person or a bad artist, but it does mean you have to fix it if you're serious about improving.

IP Logged

CommanderD97
Midshipman

Joined: 28 April 2009
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 47

Posted: 08 July 2009 at 10:04am

Alright, update:

Hacth: I didn't quite understand what you said about the shading coming onto the screen...

Artisan: I put something on the screen, now.

EDIT: I just realized that screens aren't at the same level of the moniter itself...So I'll work on that.

Edited by CommanderD97 - 08 July 2009 at 10:08am

IP Logged

CommanderD97
Midshipman

Joined: 28 April 2009
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 47

Posted: 08 July 2009 at 11:21am

ANOTHER UPDATE:

this might be the last...

anything wrong with it?

IP Logged

The Mozack
Commander

Joined: 16 October 2005
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 132

Posted: 08 July 2009 at 11:37am

Would it be possible to use lighter colours for the text, or use a darker colour for the screen and white text instead? Black makes the words stick out like a sore thumb, especially with the latest one, when it takes up way too much space on the screen

Edited by The Mozack - 08 July 2009 at 11:39am

IP Logged

CommanderD97
Midshipman

Joined: 28 April 2009
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 47

Posted: 08 July 2009 at 11:52am

alright...I'll try something else.

IP Logged

cure
Commander

Joined: 23 March 2022
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2859

Posted: 08 July 2009 at 11:52am

i still wouldn't let this in. you haven't changed any of the underlying flaws. it has to be scrapped. start fresh. get a better angle, rather than head-on. don't use garish colors. put something interesting on the screen. that font looks pretty rough, ruins anything the piece would have had going for it

IP Logged

CommanderD97
Midshipman

Joined: 28 April 2009
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 47

Posted: 08 July 2009 at 2:11pm

okay, now you guys are just being mean.

PS:

I'll start working on something else.

IP Logged

cure
Commander

Joined: 23 March 2022
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2859

Posted: 08 July 2009 at 3:01pm

this topic is therefore closed.

IP Logged

WIP (Work In Progress)
Pixel Joint Forum : Pixel Art : WIP (Work In Progress)

Author	Message
CommanderD97 Midshipman Joined: 28 April 2009 Online Status: Offline Posts: 47	Topic: Computer Moniter Posted: 07 July 2009 at 7:01pm
	I don't understand why this didn't get in: Does it need work?
	IP Logged

Artisan Commander Joined: 01 February 2006 Online Status: Offline Posts: 219	Posted: 07 July 2009 at 7:09pm
	yes it does. while it is pixel art it is not of quality. while it does not need to be amazingly good you need to put in effort to make your work nice. What can you do? draw the moniter from a better angle. why a green screen? put something on the screen? a better depiction of shapes. a detailed background or transparancy. a good use of colour. some sense of DEPTH ... good luck ;)
	I like shiny things, i do indeed.
	IP Logged

Hatch Admiral Joined: 05 August 2015 Online Status: Offline Posts: 1387	Posted: 07 July 2009 at 7:30pm
	Think about the shapes and levels of depth your monitor. The way you've shaded it makes it look like it's all on one plane. You seem especially confused about the stand--every stand I've seen is somewhat behind the screen. Also, the screen itself--the green part--looks like it's slightly ABOVE the case because there's a strong highlight where there should be a shadow. think about it--light from the top left, the case is slightly raised from the screen... it'd be casting a shadow onto the screen. Think about your colors. Straight grays tend to be dull--inject just a little color and your picture will come to life. Also, not every color color has to be nuclear cartoon saturated. here's a quick edit illustrating these points + some general sprucing up. let me know if any of this is unclear or if you're not sure why I did this or that. -> [EDIT] Just read the comments for this piece in the gallery. asukicco's comment was uncalled-for and rude. don't get discouraged Edited by Hatch - 07 July 2009 at 7:35pm
	IP Logged

CommanderD97 Midshipman Joined: 28 April 2009 Online Status: Offline Posts: 47	Posted: 08 July 2009 at 8:34am
	thanks, but I'm not going for the super realistic look. I just wanted a cartoony monitor. I'll work on it and post something else in a little while.
	IP Logged

Hatch Admiral Joined: 05 August 2015 Online Status: Offline Posts: 1387	Posted: 08 July 2009 at 9:18am
	Making something "cartoony" is a matter of careful exaggeration and de-emphasis of various elements. It's not something that happens by accident or by simply misunderstanding the forms of your subject. The way you've shaded many parts of the monitor makes no sense. It doesn't mean you're a bad person or a bad artist, but it does mean you have to fix it if you're serious about improving.
	IP Logged

CommanderD97 Midshipman Joined: 28 April 2009 Online Status: Offline Posts: 47	Posted: 08 July 2009 at 10:04am
	Alright, update: Hacth: I didn't quite understand what you said about the shading coming onto the screen... Artisan: I put something on the screen, now. EDIT: I just realized that screens aren't at the same level of the moniter itself...So I'll work on that. Edited by CommanderD97 - 08 July 2009 at 10:08am
	IP Logged

CommanderD97 Midshipman Joined: 28 April 2009 Online Status: Offline Posts: 47	Posted: 08 July 2009 at 11:21am
	ANOTHER UPDATE: this might be the last... anything wrong with it?
	IP Logged

The Mozack Commander Joined: 16 October 2005 Online Status: Offline Posts: 132	Posted: 08 July 2009 at 11:37am
	Would it be possible to use lighter colours for the text, or use a darker colour for the screen and white text instead? Black makes the words stick out like a sore thumb, especially with the latest one, when it takes up way too much space on the screen Edited by The Mozack - 08 July 2009 at 11:39am
	IP Logged

CommanderD97 Midshipman Joined: 28 April 2009 Online Status: Offline Posts: 47	Posted: 08 July 2009 at 11:52am
	alright...I'll try something else.
	IP Logged

cure Commander Joined: 23 March 2022 Online Status: Offline Posts: 2859	Posted: 08 July 2009 at 11:52am
	i still wouldn't let this in. you haven't changed any of the underlying flaws. it has to be scrapped. start fresh. get a better angle, rather than head-on. don't use garish colors. put something interesting on the screen. that font looks pretty rough, ruins anything the piece would have had going for it
	IP Logged

CommanderD97 Midshipman Joined: 28 April 2009 Online Status: Offline Posts: 47	Posted: 08 July 2009 at 2:11pm
	okay, now you guys are just being mean. PS: I'll start working on something else.
	IP Logged

cure Commander Joined: 23 March 2022 Online Status: Offline Posts: 2859	Posted: 08 July 2009 at 3:01pm
	this topic is therefore closed.
	IP Logged

Topic: Computer Moniter( Topic Closed)