Estheranne Wilkins, the best darn Bard outa' Texarkana, riding her signature Flyin' Banjo -- the one they say she stole outa' Satan's footlocker, sure as day!
Herbediah Schmidt, the Ranger of the great north woods, or as he's know south of the Rio Grande, "El gringo que se esconde en los árboles"
Herb's Pet and trusty steed, Pistachio -- none other than a buck-beaked turkeypus! I'd heard tell of them 'round the campfire, but this is the first I've seen of this have-bird, half-beaver beasty!
And last, his true name nobody knows but God! He calls himself the Iron Preacher, a modern Paladin, wearing his one-of-a-kind armor crafted from milk pails and barrel hoops, swinging around an iron hot as hellfire for to brand the glory of the Lord on y'all sinners!
Who knows what it is they're off to save the world from, but I sure as heck hope it ain't me!