...but I'll tell you what's not cool; killing strippers. Strippers are people too; naked people who may be willing to pleasure you for a price you negotiate later behind the curtain of a VIP room. Besides, there's no reason to kill them, 'cause most of them are already dead inside.

And Joe, I've had new neighbors before, but none of them were half the man you are. Since you're half a man already, that splits them into some kind of fraction I can't even measure.

I had such a crush on her. Until I met you Lois. You're my silver medal.

See, Meg, things always work out if you just do whatever you want without thinking about the consequences.

What are you gonna make me do? Whack a guy? Off a guy? Whack off a guy? 'Cause I'm married.

If you want an autograph right now, you either got to give me a pen or some snow.

Make like Siamese twins and split ... and then one of you die.

Excuse me sir, I believe you're in my seat and I had sex with your mother.